Even as a little kid, I liked flying home. Not the chaos of the security checks, the trip itself, or even the weary drive back to our house. But I love that first step outside SeaTac Airport. When I exit the airport after hours of flight and days of vacation – I breathe in the Pacific Northwest air as slowly and deliberately as I can. No matter where I’ve been or how much I enjoyed myself, that first breath always tastes like the freshest, cleanest air I’ve ever known.

My flight back from Boston was forgettable. I took a taxi from my school at 5 am, spent a two hour layover in Chicago, and finally made it to Seattle after 12 hours. As tired as I was, I anticipated the step outside. I usually get this incredible emotion, a mix of contentment and familiarity, a rush of glassy lakes and painted mountains. I dragged my suitcase outside with me, looked out at the flat grey sky, and inhaled.

But… nothing.

Instead, there was something else – a strange feeling I couldn’t place. It sat in my chest, somewhat uncomfortably, even as the Toyota pulled up and I saw my mother for the first time since summer.

When we came home, the first thing I did was walk to the kitchen. I expected fireworks to burst in my heart, rainbows to pump through my veins and surge out my fingertips when we reunited. Nothing had changed in my absence. The walls were the same marigold yellow, the same checkerboard tile covered the floor, but somehow it wasn’t the kitchen I’d remembered and missed. It looked cramped and dim, hardly big enough for three people and two dogs.

I wheeled my bag into my old room, pulled out my Boston sweatshirt, and fell asleep without unpacking.

Over the next few days, I saw Grandma and my parents, which made me feel like daybreak inside. Almost at once I caught up with old friends, a both strange and easy experience. But during the afternoon, with no classes or job to distract me, I got bored. If I wasn’t asleep, I suffered from bad headaches all day. And that uncomfortable feeling lodged in my chest hadn’t vanished.

By now, I’ve figured out what the feeling is… homesickness. I know it’s ridiculous to feel homesick for school when I’m home. I also see how pointless it is to wallow in sadness, pining for Boston, while I have three weeks left in this beautiful place. If I don’t appreciate the rain, family, and happiness I can only find in Seattle, I’ll regret it a month later when I’m gone.

The solution for the headaches didn’t come in Tylenol. It’s a healthy combination of Mom’s noodle soup, Dad’s sweater hugs, damp dog paws all over my bed and the tug of a camera strap. It’s a sifting of flour on my apron and cinnamon dust on my palms. It’s not exactly a bitter pill to swallow.

One of the best things about being home is the food. Predictable, but it isn’t even the food as much as the ingredients. There are the luxury items I haven’t bought in college – all natural creamy peanut butter, the kind you have to stir up before spreading. Soft handmade tortillas, brown rice, even almonds! It’s a joyful thing to appreciate a quick handful of almonds before dinner. And produce! Even in winter, at home I’m eating crisp spinach and sweet Asian pears.

The school menu never changes, and most of the fruit comes out of a can, soaked in sugary syrup. At home, every flavor is amplified. The grapefruit I sliced with my first breakfast back was so clean and fresh, the sharpest thing I’d tasted in ages. After I devoured it, I thought about citrus the rest of the day. I’ve been drinking grapefruits the way parched survivors reach for water.

Reacquainting myself with our kitchen is like slipping into a familiar song. Every measuring cup is where I know it’ll be. Pans still clink and clatter in our cupboard, and that old bag of shredded coconut still has some life in it. The microplane zester, still my favorite tool in the room, is just as sharp as ever. The result? Coconut-Grapefruit Cupcakes with Matcha Frosting.

Even baked into a cupcake, the grapefruit manages to refresh. It’s light and zingy, pairing beautifully with the sweetness of coconut. And the frosting? I wanted something mellow and subtle, and the green tea powder I bought from Pike Place Market over the summer was just the right touch.

When I opened that oven door, the warm air that surged up was so fragrant and sweet. I was caught off guard by how hot it was, and how good it felt against the oven mitt. Later, in bed, I rolled over and pressed my nose into my hair – it smelled like sugar. It was one of the best smells I’d almost forgotten.

I think I’ll bake again tomorrow.

[It's good to be back. See you in 2011!]

Coconut-Grapefruit Cupcakes
Adapted from Martha Stewart
Makes 21 cupcakes

1 3/4 cups all purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup sweetened shredded coconut, finely chopped
1 1/2 sticks (6 oz) unsalted butter, softened
1 1/4 cups sugar
Zest of 2 grapefruits
2 large eggs + 2 large egg whites
3/4 cup unsweetened coconut milk
1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Line cupcake tins with paper liners.

Whisk the flour, baking powder, salt, and coconut together in a large bowl. In an electric mixer, cream the butter, sugar, and grapefruit zest until light and fluffy. Add the egg whites one at a time, beating well between whites.

On low speed, add the dry ingredients in 3 additions, alternating with the coconut milk and ending with the dry ingredients. Fill the cupcake tins 2/3 full and bake until a toothpick comes out clean, about 20 minutes. Cool on wire racks before frosting.

Matcha Frosting
Adapted from Savory Sweet Life

1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, softened
2 cups powdered sugar, sifted
1 teaspoon matcha (green tea powder)
Pinch of salt
1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 tablespoons milk or heavy cream

Beat the butter in an electric mixer with the paddle attachment on medium speed for a few minutes. Add the powdered sugar and matcha. Stir on the lowest speed possible (or give it a few turns first by hand to avoid sugar flying everywhere) until the sugar’s incorporated into the butter. Then beat on medium speed and add the vanilla extract and salt. Beat for 3 minutes, then beat in a tablespoon of milk, adding more (or less) if necessary. More milk will make a thinner frosting, more sugar will make a stiffer frosting.

Printer-Friendly Version – Coconut-Grapefruit Cupcakes with Matcha Frosting

I have a confession to make. Don’t be mad, okay?

I’m not actually 17.

When I first unveiled my new food blog, the first thing my dad said was, “That’s a little precocious, isn’t it?” Maybe. I just didn’t see the point in using 16, since my birthday is in 2 1/2 weeks (!) and I figured I would just have to be a bit misleading for a month. It’s a little weird only being 16 – with a few exceptions, I’m one of the youngest food bloggers I’ve seen. On the one hand, I’m at a bit of a disadvantage, with school and my limited time and budget. On the other hand, I think I’m getting a real leg up – I wonder how many foodies discovered their passion for cooking as young as I did! In this sense, I’m pretty lucky to be 16.

Anyway, the nice thing about turning 17, besides cake and finally fitting into my title, is the birthday present I’m planning. A real camera. My Kodak EasyShare is fine when I go to the park or for photos on vacation, but when I’m trying to zoom in on some crumbly shortbread action, it’s a little lacking. I’ve been looking around and I think I’ve decided on a Canon Rebel XTi with a Canon 50mm 1.8 lens. It’s a bit pricey for a hobby but my parents and I will share the cost… and hopefully I’ll be able to take the food photography that I see in my head!

What about you? What kind of camera do you use, and what do you suggest I buy?

But onto the recipe. I’m still on a matcha kick after getting a whole package of the stuff. Seriously, I dream in pale green.  These Green Tea Shortbread cookies are being shipped off to my mom’s best friend for her birthday. She loves buttery, melt-in-your-mouth cookies, and these were perfect.

Originally, the recipe uses leaf shaped cookie cutters. Along with the subtle green from the matcha, the cookies were adorable. My mother and I considered driving to the next city over to get leaf cookie cutters before we realized how ridiculous that was. I ended up using tree shaped cutters.

The recipe is very straight forward. There’s only 5 ingredients, and it produces a dry butter cookie that literally melts in your mouth. The green tea flavor is light, but definitely there, and the color is really beautiful. I personally like moist and chewy cookies better than shortbread, but I still ate a couple myself.

Green Tea Shortbread
Adapted from Martha Stewart Living
Makes 15 3″ cookies

2 cups all purpose flour
3 tablespoons matcha (green tea powder)
Pinch of salt
2 sticks of butter, room temperature
1/2 cup powdered sugar

Sift the flour, matcha, and salt together in a bowl.

With an electric mixer, beat the butter on medium speed until fluffy (about 5 minutes.) Add in the powdered sugar and beat until very fluffy and light (3 minutes more for me.) Add in the flour mixture and stir on low speed until just combined.

Roll out the dough to 3/4″ thickness on a lightly floured surface. Freeze the dough until firm, around 20 minutes.

Preheat the oven to 325 degrees. Using a 3″ cookie cutter, cut out as many shapes as possible – I used a Christmas tree shape. Reroll the remaining dough and freeze again while the first batch bakes. Bake cookies for 20 minutes or until begining to brown around the edges. Cool cookies on a wire rack until room temperature.

Printer Friendly Version – Green Tea Shortbread

Today one of my friends, P– came into 5th period English waving around a nearly-blank white piece of paper. He was trying to contain himself, but not all that well. Something was clearly up. He tried to look modest as he passed me the print out.

“Dear P.–, congratulations! We are pleased to announce that you have been accepted into the University of Chicago.”

The University of Chicago! I’m impressed, but I can’t say I’m surprised. He is not only an excellent student and a talented athlete but an all around great person. What’s even more amazing is he’s now four for four – he’s been accepted to the University of Washington, NYU, and Georgetown. All he has left to hear from are the Ivy Leagues – Harvard, Yale, and Columbia.

I am so proud of him. And that is why I chose to bake, to celebrate.

Well, not really. I don’t know about you but these days I’m finding that I jump at any excuse to cross a recipe off my humongous, out of control “must try” list. Someone’s birthday is coming up? I’m just as excited as they are. P– said it was hardly a special occasion, but no one turns down free cake.

I knew exactly what I wanted to make, too, after seeing Bakerella’s scandelously gorgeous Chocolate Matcha Bundt Cake. The chocolate against the green was stunning. It was kind of a no brainer.

Matcha is something I’ve tried and liked. I have dozens of different recipes bookmarked that call for it. Unfortunately, for me matcha is one of those rare, exotic ingredients that I never buy out of price and inconvenience. Like blackberries, which are ridiculously expensive, or cardamom, which I can never use in anything else. But as luck would have it, I made a birthday cake for someone earlier this month and he returned the plate along with an enormous package of matcha powder. The thing is as big as a box of sugar! This was my first recipe using matcha, ever.

The cake itself is very good. It’s moist, rich, and dense, and the colors are every bit as beautiful as I’d hoped. I admit that I like the chocolate better than the matcha, but what can I say – I’m a chocolate person by a mile. I might even consider making this recipe again, using only the chocolate mixture.

The batter actually made enough for a 10 cup bundt cake plus 6 cupcakes. My one complaint was this: when the chocolate batter is on the outside, it looks extremely appealing. When the green matcha batter is on the outside, it looks porous and somewhat unappetizing. Luckily, I wanted the matcha to be a surprise and put chocolate batter against the pan for the cake. In any case, this recipe is a keeper. I can’t wait to try more with this lovely, fragrant powder.

Chocolate Matcha Bundt Cake
Adapted from Bakerella
Makes a 10 cup bundt cake, plus extra

Chocolate Batter
1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
1/2 cup cocoa powder
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt

Matcha Batter
1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
3 tbsp matcha powder
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt

Wet Ingredients
3 cups sugar
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, room temperature
3 large eggs, room temperature
1 3/4 cup milk (or soy milk), room temperature
1 tsp vanilla

Preheat the oven to 325 degrees. Grease a 10 cup bundt pan and dust with cocoa powder, or flour. There will be batter leftover for cupcakes so prepare 6 muffin tins, or use a 12 cup bundt pan instead.

Whisk together all the ingredients for the chocolate batter in a small bowl. In a separate bowl, whisk together all the ingredients for the matcha batter.

Cream the butter and sugar with the paddle attachment of a mixer. Add in the eggs, then the milk and vanilla. Mix until thoroughly combined, then separate into two bowls.

Mix the chocolate batter ingredients into one bowl of the wet ingredients, and mix the matcha batter ingredients into the other bowl of wet ingredients.

Spoon the two batters into the bundt pan, alternating batters until the pan is 3/4 full. Drag a long, thin knife through the batter to create a marbled effect. Fill the muffin tins with the leftover batter.

Bake the bundt cake for 1 hour and 15 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean. The cupcakes take less time to cook, around 50 minutes.

Printer Friendly Version – Chocolate Matcha Bundt Cake